What words, phrases or signs do you use and how do you get your partner’s attention?
When my wife can’t remember someone’s name, she’ll grab my hand and squeeze it with two quick squeezes “Help. Me.”.
That’s my cue to either work their name into a comment/question or, if I don’t know them, introduce myself followed by a “And you are…?”. Works pretty well all of the time.
Of course, being together so long, and loving to fuck with each other’s heads when we can, sometimes I’ll just stand there and give them my best Aussie “owzitgoin?”, and watch my wife squirm. That’s usually when the nails dig into my hand, hoping to draw blood.
Worth it.
When we travel: speak japanese. Else, we’ve been together enough to know each other pretty well and often don’t need to say much aloud to communicate something
Instead of spelling it out or code, my wife and I will use increasingly obscure synonyms to hide our conversations from the kids.
They figured out “frozen confection” meant ice cream, so I need a new one.
Pig Latin. Kids haven’t figured it out yet. One can spell so that went out the window.
Next stop is probably Morse code.
“Do we have any pineapple at home?” is our safe word for social situations when one of us needs a reason to leave a situation or change the conversation because they’re uncomfortable. I detest pineapple.
Married 30 years. Eyebrow position and, “eh?”
“Eh.”
And we are pretty much on the same page.
My spouse and I lived in a bunch of countries over the years. We speak Quebec French, English, and Spanish, as well as a smattering of Chinese, Bulgarian, Korean, and a few odds and ends here and there.
We basically speak whatever we think people around us won’t understand. Very colloquial Quebec French in non-French-speaking countries, Chinese around white people, Bulgarian around non-white people, or even a cryptic mix of everything when we’re not completely sure.
We figure anyone who understands is probably someone we want to know… Hasn’t happened very often, but it does happen. So far we weren’t saying anything overly embarrassing when we got caught, but we sure as hell have no filter between us because of this!
I’ve taught my husband to speak a bit of Japanese, but we don’t use it this way because that’s extremely rude.
I wouldn’t say we speak in people’s faces, but we make comments to each other about random stuff. I would never say something rude about somebody in their faces, but my spouse might go, “Can we go back to the hotel, I really need to take a shit” or something silly and unfiltered like that.
I get it, I just still think it’s rude and avoid doing so myself.
It’s rude for spouses to have a private conversation? Would whispering be better? Would it be better if they hid in a cupboard where no one could see them?
Yes, it’s generally considered rude to switch languages specifically to hide your conversation.
It’s because most will assume you are doing it to talk shit.
Sure, if people suddenly switched languages and then laughed in my face, I would feel bad.
But if it’s like the other comments in this post, and it’s a couple having a quick word about a private matter, I wouldn’t mind. It’s not like I should be a part of that conversation
Which they are.
Agree, it’s rude af.
Tell me you’re insecure without saying you’re insecure.
If I tell my partner that something drains the color out of a room, she knows that whomever I’m talking to is a bigot/phobe and we leave. More often than not though, she’ll ask me who it is and tell them off.
This is amazing, I love it.
Well, sometimes she is a bit overprotective, once she punched someone who wasn’t respecting my pronouns LOL.
